Happy Sunday, snippeteers! I'm on my way back home from vacation, but here's the snippet I scheduled before I left from my YA paranormal thriller After Me. (You can catch up on the earlier excerpts here. Last week, Jada found out that she has "super zombie strength." She thinks that's pretty sweet, but it doesn't explain the weird attraction she feels for Lew Stanton—computer whiz and crazy math watch wearer. According to the Transdead Trustee guidelines, she's not supposed to be feeling any emotions. She e-mails Flo, her Afterlife Advisor, as soon as she gets home (with the subject line: What the hell?) and this is the response she gets. I didn't count the addresses or signature as sentences so this may put me over the limit. So sue me. ;-)
FROM: florence@blueyonder.net
TO: dead_girls_do_it_better@gmail.com
SUBJECT: RE: What the [redacted]?
Dear Miss Gayle:
Apparently, an addendum to your termination agreement was inadvertently left out of your paperwork, and the new objectives were just uploaded today. In addition to your prime directive of finding the man who killed you, you must also learn to handle normal human emotions, since you did not experience them while you were alive. This explains your feelings for the young man you mentioned. Don’t be surprised if you also feel a strong desire to befriend another girl your own age. These things are not negotiable. So, in the vernacular of yourself and your peers, you need to “deal.”
Don’t forget to change your e-mail address to something more appropriate.
Regards,
Florence
Next week Jada discovers another one of her "super zombie powers." Can't wait? You can buy After Me here. And please do also check out the other Snippet Sunday folks and the Weekend Writing Warriors. Something for everyone among these talented writers!
~Stay true to yourself and your dreams will come true!
See all my books at my Web site
Follow me on Twitter
Like my Facebook Fan Page
Very formal and to the point. Likely not what she wants to hear. I love the email subject and sender address. Great job! :D
ReplyDeleteReally too hilarious! I love how they can just add to her challenges. Excellent excerpt!
ReplyDeleteNo, Jada! Don't change your email address! Poor thing- she's going to have to "deal" with a lot more than she'd originally bargained for. Love the tone of Florence's letter.
ReplyDeleteThat last line about the email address had me laughing out loud and scaring my rats who are now demanding treats since I woke them up. And I LOVE her email address! (I wonder if she can get out of the contract since it wasn't fully disclosed.)
ReplyDeleteEverything about this is hilarious. I love when books mix in short emails/letters/etc while telling the story and you do a great job with this little email.
ReplyDeleteFlorence sounds like the "tough love" lady. :-) Good snippet, Joyce. Sorry your vacation is over so soon!
ReplyDeleteOh this just keeps getting better and better. Love it! A more approriate email address? That is hilarious. Great email!
ReplyDeleteWhat a great last line ... funny ....
ReplyDeleteLOL. Better and better.
ReplyDeleteROFL! Oh this is flipping priceless! I LOVE the email address and her overall attitude. I seriously need to read this book. I need to buy it. I can't wait to see her reaction to this response email.
ReplyDeleteI'm enjoying the flippant humor in this book. Personally, I like her e-mail address, too!
ReplyDeleteThis whole snippet had me rolling. Great snippet.
ReplyDelete"you must also learn to handle normal human emotions, since you did not experience them while you were alive" Wait WHAT?
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious.